Re-educating the Stress Response
Stress is a very commonly used word that tends to be freely included in many everyday conversations – “I am so stressed about it…” “Don’t stress,” “She is stressing me out,” “I am so busy and stressed!” And so, it continues, from stress at home, to stress at work, social stress, physical stress to online stress. Is there a stress epidemic? Is it worse now than it has ever been before? Or is it our lack of ability to identify stressors, our perception and interpretation of these stressors, our lack of tools to cope effectively with stress, or simply our personal automated response mechanism during times of stress?
The answer is often – it depends, but let’s explore it further! According to the English Dictionary stress is defined as:
“A state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or demanding circumstances.”
Surely the adversity or demand of the situation is purely dependant on our perception, our past experiences and quite possibly the expectations or viewpoints of ourselves and others involved in the situation. This would therefore imply we have a choice in how to respond and can change that stress response.
Stress is of course not our enemy, without it we cannot adapt, grow, and become stronger and more resilient. Eustress is the name given to positive stress, a concept we all need to embrace, however, stress must be balanced with non-stress and rest, so there is time to recover and adapt in a healthy manner.
According to McGrath (1970), the process of stress response can be seen clearly in four distinct phases.
How much of what you encounter daily is actually stressful? How much physical and psychological stress are you under and how do you monitor these levels as being acceptable or unacceptable? From this environmental pressure, how do you interpret the stress you feel yourself under? Do you recognise the effects? Do you ignore the effects? Do you just carry on because you feel there is no other choice?
How does this stress come out in your emotions and mental state? Do you become withdrawn? Maybe short-tempered? Do you break down and cry? How about physically? Where do you feel it? Is there pain? Do you even know?
The effects and interpretation of stress can be witnessed primarily in our physical body. We may feel an immediate increase in heart rate and breathing rate, this can progress into feelings of constant anxiety and worrying and thus the inability to rest, sleep and concentrate. During times of stress our ability to make decisions is hampered and this can lead to poorer food and exercise choices, as well as indulging in more alcohol or drugs to attempt to combat how we are feeling.
We become accustomed to being in a state of stress, living primarily from our sympathetic nervous system (fight, flight, freeze, fold). In this state, our breathing rate is the key source of activation. Think for a moment how your breath might change if you are faced with a terrifying situation, such as a small dog running out in front of your car. Your body is triggered to respond with swift actions to ensure survival, breath rate increases alerting the body to the oncoming danger.
In the wild, when an animal is faced with a near death, or frightening encounter, you may notice how they tend to ‘shake it off’. This is exactly how we are also designed; observe and experience the fear (stressor), body responds, fearful encounter ends, body responds (shakes it off) and reverts to its pre-event state. In simple terms, our body should switch from sympathetic response to parasympathetic response with ease, but sadly many people have lost the ability to switch between the two systems and find themselves in a permanent state of stress, coming from anticipation of stress rather than near death experiences. This is ultimately creating stress related illnesses and dis-ease, which take hold in the body overtime. Combine this with our heightened breathing rate – the signal to the body that danger is immanent, the body responds, and so the cycle of stress is established.
Our decisions become affected by this burden that we have placed upon ourselves, but often unknowingly our body crystallises each experience of this stress deep in the muscle cells and tissues, where we continue to hold it. We may feel the effects of this stress immediately or over the months and years to come. It may present as a twinge in the lower back or a constant ache in the shoulder, or constant headaches and fatigue. Sometimes we get so used to feeling this way, that it becomes our norm, and we forget how it actually feels to be healthy and at peace in our lives.
Our physical response, just like our mental and emotional response is often ignored until the crescendo comes in the form of illness or complete debilitation and our wheels completely fall off.
If we pay more attention and cultivate a greater awareness of our perception and response, we will begin to see behavioural patterns emerging earlier. Cycles of behaviour or programming can become so ingrained in our subconscious that we miss vital information that our miraculous body is providing us that something is not quite right, and we become stuck in this cycle of destructive behaviour.
By paying attention and shifting our interpretation and perception of the situation we find ourselves in, these patterns can be changed, and new responses can develop. In yogic terms these thought impressions and patterns that we adopt is referred to as a ‘samskara’. Each samakara leaves an imprint in our minds and bodies. When we engage in healthy experiences, it helps us to develop positive samskaras, however, if we allow ourselves to repeatedly adopt unhealthy or negative experiences, then negative samskaras will take seat in our cycle of responses. This cycle may continue and build over our lifetime, unless we find a means to release it, change it and create space.
Life has always been and will continue to be fraught will stressors, but often now, our own mind is simply creating an unmanageable amount of pressure and stress to deal with daily and what we are perceiving as important and vital to achieve, is really just a misperception of the demands placed upon us. What if we could take a step back and view this perception at a more a subjective distance? What if we could completely withdraw from this need to constantly be striving to do and simply give ourselves time to ‘be’. From this viewpoint of being we can begin to really get in touch with what lies within and become more effective in cultivating an environment where we can ‘see more clearly’ and thus empower ourselves to be the major player in our own personal healing and health.
Something that is generally missing from our ‘To Do’ list is this concept of just allowing ourselves to be still, to be present and truly feel what the body is feeling and what the deeper sense of self and our breath is really trying to tell us. This enables us to listen and when we listen, we open ourselves up to a whole new state of awareness. By learning how to simply be still and supported in a deep sense of presence will work on not only the physical symptoms of stress but also on the perception and necessity of stress.
The adage - How you do anything in life is how you do EVERYTHING in life, is one of my favourites to reflect on. It sums up so clearly our natural tendencies, that are so entrenched in our being and clearly reflect our inherent response system. The type of work ethic we adopt, our lifestyle choices, our relationships, the type of exercise that we choose, all the things we do, will reflect the predominant tendencies that we have. Think about it for a second, if you are generally very busy and place a lot of pressure on yourself to achieve each day, the type of yoga practice that may appeal to you initially would probably be a fast-paced vinyasa, power flow or hot yoga, as this gives you a good sense of achievement and you can fully observe your improvements in your physicality. This reflects that drive, striving and desire to achieve something, which is part of your inner program. However, to balance that tendency to drive and strive we need the sense of balance, time to draw in all that we are giving out and just be still and ‘be’ in what is in that moment, rather than moving quickly to the next. As this is not our normal pattern of behaviour, we may dismiss a more relaxing, reflective practice as a waste of time before even giving it a try.
Yoga is an ingenious system; a science that truly works and at the core is the breath, intrinsically weaving it all together and allowing you to find stillness and space. However, we need an access point, and this is commonly through the physical body. It is vital that we do not overlook the importance of a somatic practice and releasing the physical stress from wherever it is held in the body. One of the most effective tools I have found in addition to breathwork is the beautiful practice of restorative yoga, breath centred of course!
I did not think for a second that I had time in my life to indulge in this gentle practice, surely it was just a form of laziness. I could not possibly fit this into to my already packed schedule and still find time to complete my active practice, breath practices and meditation. There was resistance there, so the question had to be why was there resistance? For me, it was about not feeling I deserved this time, this practice was gentle (although at times confronting), it made me stay still long enough to feel what I was feeling, and it helped me to soften and be kinder to myself. It held me in delicious postures where I felt safe, supported, and able to let go of the control I held over everything. Restorative became less of an indulgence and more of a necessity to balance the rest of my rather hectic life. I commonly gift myself ten or twenty minutes a day to feel that sense of ease, to stop and breathe, re-energising my body and calm my mind. It has been a very important teacher in my own stress management and as important to me as finding time to eat nutritious, healthy food.
This practice, if done regularly has the power to deeply influence our perception, awareness and response. It holds us in a supportive way, that allows our stress and anxieties to melt away, revealing that pure essence and reality that we are not everything we tell ourselves that we are. With deep relaxation comes deep release and a letting go that can work through that crystalisation of emotions that have found their way into every muscle and cell. The postures combined with the power of the breath, brings you systematically into parasympathetic response, allowing the body and mind time to heal.
To change your perception is to change the way your mind is programmed, to take the time every week to cultivate a practice that is not physically or mentally exhausting, where you are not striving and doing. An opportunity to be held in a position which fully supports you, that enables you release the blockages in your physical body, breathe and release creating space. In time, permission is granted to look at your potential to expand your mind, allowing for awareness to develop and change and growth to occur. To see things differently, to perceive stress in an altered way, our thinking processes need to change, as does our inherent responses and behaviours.
By committing to a more breath centred, restorative practice will give you the tools you need to make a positive difference in your life. Don’t wait until the wheels have truly fallen off before you take notice. Value yourself enough to take some time out of your day to enhance your self-care and watch the subtle changes that come with that. The change in perception, the space between thought and action, the better decision making, improved sleep and emotional resiliency. You absolutely have a choice about how you respond to life.
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” (Victor Frankl)